Tuesday, November 25, 2003
Selamat Hari Raya!

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Laa Illaha illallahuAllahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar Walillahilham...
Hearing the takbir every end of Ramadhan never fails to leave an everlasting impression in me. This Ramadhan, I feel that I've spent it differently from all other Ramadhans.. My only regret during this Ramadhan was getting involved in a band. At times when I was supposed to be at home praying or reading the Quran, I was in school jamming my ass off. hmf. But anyhow otherwise, I feel different. I feel much fulfilled and i look at this new month of Syawal through a new perspective.
Went to Ar-Raudhah straight away after Subuh. The mood was different. And I felt that it was right. It was so calm, so peaceful, so serene, so solemn. That should be the right mood to mark the end of Ramadhan. Not watching some trashy Hari Raya concert on Suria the night before, or on the morning of Syawal. We kept reciting the takbir over and over again. Very fufilling, i must say. I felt that it really was the time for me to reflect on the past Ramadhan, and also this year, 2003. Have I done enough to serve Him? Why have i countlessly gone against His word? Do I deserve paradise? Brings out the true, spirited meaning of Hari Raya.
This would be the second Ramadhan where my mum didn't cook. I think that's good too. Everyone nowadays is so concentrated on making kuih, cooking and slaving in the kitchen for raya. I used to think it was fun. Now, i think its just a waste of time. Why bother doing such stuff and sacrifice terawih? or even just simple devotion? Maybe cos my grandma's not staying with me anymore (she's living with her other grandchildren), so no more visitors on the first day of raya. I want every raya to come to be celebrated this way. Not embellished at all. Today really gave me an opportunity to appreciate my friends and family God's precious gifts to me.
To my dearest Muslim brothers and sisters, (lets see if i can list everyone down...Whoo! Its gonna be a challenge...) Well here goes..baba atikk sam lydia shai ayeshah sab rabbiah nina ada halim hirman suff aizat is irwan nas // farhana afsheen maisurah maisarah nadiah suransi farah liana asiah adlina shahidah nana fiza izean azean suraya // nur.A nur.I hafiza farhana wahidah // selamat hari raya! I really am thankful that i met all of you. You brought joy into my life and i really treasure our friendship so far. Thanks for being there for me. To the others that I know I've failed to mention ( i really can't remember all, you know!) Selamat Hari Raya to you too... Maaf zahir dan Batin, kalau terkasar bahasa ke apa-apa lah. You know I can be a bitch sometimes.
Life. what a rollercoaster. I think i'm at the peak of a loop now. Don't wanna come down from that loop. life rocks.